Proverbs 11:29- He that troubleth his own house shall inherit the wind: and the fool shall be servant to the wise of heart.
What does this mean? We are bringing the fruits of our labor to nothing. It's like the wind blowing a lot of stuff around, but accomplishing nothing. We can trouble our house by doing some things that will destroy everything that we hope to achieve.
Proverbs 14:1- Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.
A wise person, specifically the wife in this passage, will build her house. She will instill some godly characteristics in the foundation of the home. The children will learn to be prudent and respectful by her example. However, the foolish woman destroys her home with her ahnds. It's through her own actions.
What actions will trouble our house and cause us to be the destroyer?
The first is rebellion.
Isaiah 15:23- For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft, and stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry. Because thou hast rejected the word of the LORD, he hath also rejected thee from being king.
Wow! Saul certainly destroyed his house. He knew what God wanted and did his own thing. He lost out on his family being the line of kings in Israel. He missed the blessing of the Messiah coming through his lineage. His children followed him in death because of his stubborn rebellion.
If you follow his story, you'll find that he only spirals from here because he refused to repent and change his ways.
I don't care what God says, I'm going to have what I want when I want it, no matter the cost!
The second way to trouble your house is through covetousness.
Psalm 10:3- For the wicked boasteth of his heart's desire, and blesseth the covetous, whom the LORD abhorreth.
Luke 16:14- And the Pharisees also, who were covetous, heard all these things: and they derided him.
The wicked man in Psalms is boasting about his evil desires and his pursuit of them. He's blessing those who are going about to obtain what they shouldn't have- the covetous.
It was because of this sin that the Pharisees wouldn't accept the Messiah. And Psalms points out that the Lord abhors this type of person.
Why? A covetous person doesn't seem to be satisfied. They always want the next best thing, or person, no matter what it costs to get it. This will certainly destroy a home and family.
I want that. It's gonna help me out. It may cost more than I have, but I can't live without it!
The third way to destroy your home is through cruelty.
Proverbs 11:17- The merciful man doeth good to his own soul: but he that is cruel troubleth his own flesh.
Cruelty will only bring harm to yourself. Many people ruin the happiness of their homes by being cruel.
What is cruelty? The proverb shows it contrasted to mercy. It's being hard and harsh for no reason. Going above and beyond in judgment and punishment when it isn't going to bring any change.
Hebrews 11:36 also uses the words "mocking" and "scourging" in the context of cruelty.
Many times as parents, we can destroy our homes by being too hard on our children. As spouses, we can trouble the peace of our homes by not forgiving, and by trying to seek vengeance. "Getting even" usually ends up in a cruel mistreatment of others.
I'll show them that they can't treat me like this and get away with it! They'll wish they had never done that.
Another way we can trouble our house is through laziness.
Proverbs 20:4- The sluggard will not plow by reason of the cold; therefore shall he beg in harvest, and have nothing.
A lazy person just won't put in the effort. And they can make up excuses for any given circumstance- I can't keep my house clean, or get a job, or take care of my family because...
Really, there are no good excuses for letting your home go down the drain because you just didn't want to bother with it.
Kids are too hard, and take too much effort, and so I'm just gonna let the tv raise them.
The last way is through faithlessness.
John 20:27b- and be not faithless, but believing.
Not believing what God says. Not staying faithful. These things can trouble a house.
Staying faithful to God can get us through some really tough times. It can give us the strength to carry on when all around us seems to be falling apart. And it can give us wisdom to see past the wiles of the devil.
But, also, staying faithful to our spouses and our families. Divorce is on the rise because of all of these reasons listed above- someone wasn't faithful, each were being cruel, somebody was too lazy, there was fighting because of rebellion, and the covetousness just ripped away anything that was left to fight for.
We are destroying our homes and families with these sins. Our children are being tossed by the wayside because someone isn't willing to swallow their pride, grow up, and act like an adult. People choose to make vows and then break them because "they just weren't what I thought they'd be".
You don't understand, they aren't saved!
But, I just dodn't love them anymore!
As Paul recommends, seek not to be loosed from your marriage. If you need some counselling, get it! And remember, you aren't the same person they married either. You stood before God and man and promised. God doesn't hold you guiltless if you break that promise. He does give provision for those rare occasions- like adultery. But, he says if you divorce for any reason other than that, stay unmarried or reconcile (I Corinthians 7).
Lastly, think of your children. They need both their mother and their father. They don't need to have you two battling it out in a court room while they stand aside unable to do anything and watching their world crumble around them. They need a safe, happy, untroubled home to grow up in!
Well, my spouse is a terrible person! They don't treat me or my children right. I think I should leave to protect my children.
Sometimes, to spare our house trouble, we have to suffer some injustice. How are you going to keep your children safe if you aren't there? A divorce usually leaves children with each parent 50% of the time. You aren't thinking of your children if you divorce, you're thinking of yourself!
We have to learn to do without so that we don't destroy our homes with our hands. We need to be willing to labor to bring forth the fruits of righteousness. And we need to esteem others and their needs more than ourselves.
Or else, we may inherit the winds of nothingness!
